what my blog's all about, eh? The title is pretty self-explanatory. I'm a single girl who just can't quite get the hang of it. Don't get me wrong: I'm a girl who has her sh*t together. I'll have a Masters degree before the age of 23, I'm funny (well I'd like to think so), I have a lot of close friends, I'm very driven, etc. But let's just be real about something-- I'm awkward. I can't spit game to save my life and when I try to it's a train wreck. I have had several friends, both guys and girls, try to "coach" me in the game department but it is a hopeless cause. Uncomfortable situations just keep finding me.
I was in a relationship for a long time so I have not the slightest clue as to what I am doing in the dating world. I have never had to "play the game" and I am learning that it is so awkward and uncomfortable. The questions and thoughts that run through my head are just endless.
Some include:
"What does he expect me to say back to 'lol'?"
"Should I wear a cute shirt or a shirt solely meant for the purpose of showing off my cleavage?"
"The way I'm dancing probably does not represent the wholesome image I want to convey."
"What does this text message mean?"
"Let me talk about school so he understands that while I like to have fun, I'm also smart."
"How many other girls has he said that line to?"
"Oh, shit -- there's toilet paper stuck to my heel."
"Is that his girlfriend?"
"Wow this conversation is boring the hell out of me. How do I abort this without coming off as a bitch?"
Those are just SOME of my thoughts.
Now, my thoughts are already awkward--but imagine those thoughts coming to life once I put them into actions. Watching me try to pick up guys is like watching a dog eat peanut butter, a cow trying to get up off of its back, or a snake trying to swallow a large animal--like a zebra. It's just uncomfortable to watch. I have had a few friends tell me that my stories are entertaining and that I should start a blog -- so here I am. I figured that there are other girls out there who probably feel the same way and who are also completely unnatural at this like I am. Girls, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I hope that at some point something clicks and I learn how to spit game but until then, this blog will be my diary about these stories.
Feel free to leave comments about your similar experiences because I would love to hear them. It's always good to think, "Oh thank goodness I am not the only one who has ever experienced this."
Val, I think this is a great way to reflect on those awkward situations!! Believe it or not ur cousin here was once a teenager in that same situation. Dated someone for a few years from 16 to 18, then it broke off.....well let's just say it went sour really quick when I caught him in bed with that worthless hoe......well let's get back to the blog. Val, u are such an amazing lady inward and outward! I think those "awkward" moments happen like u say,to more girls than u. My advice...if the conversation is boring,then he must not awww you! If he talks only about himself and does not let u get a word in,give him a mirror to look at and walk on away.. I know you want to have "game"but game only works if two people are "feeling" it..u know what I mean...let's say a guy comes up that u don't find so attractive,he can say the same pick up line and talk the same "game" as a guy u find really hot,but unlike the guy u find hot u reject the guy u don't have that natural chemistry feeling for!! My point is u might have to start looking for these guys,somewhere that you like to be,what interest you....that way you don't have to worry about conversation,u automatically have something to talk about and u both obviously have already found something in common right away !!...like volunteer work at hospital....community center....or theater....book club....I know some of these places sound cheesy...but point is an activity that "Val" likes to do.. And think about it you and him will start to find other things u have in common...he could still love to go to clubs or go to that movie but ...if u have to start with one common interest make it one that u like to do!! Game is game...but game has nothing on true chemistry!! Maybe this is just a little bit of advice that can help... keep looking girl,that Mr. Right will come.......
ReplyDeletethanks, Jen! That was great advice and I completely agree with you :) I miss you very much!
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